Reprogram your Brain for Derby!

Muhammad Ali once said, "I am the astronaut of boxing. I'm in a world of my own. I am the greatest, and I said that even before I knew I was."  


This, my friends, is called positive self-talk. Knowing what you want, speaking as if it were already achieved, and then watching it come true. When I was about 13 years old, my dad said 6 words to me that would change my life. He said, "You become what you think about." At first I thought, "What a joke! How could thoughts, electrical and chemical impulses in your brain, have anything to do with who I become as a person? If that were true, I would have turned into a New Kid on the Block a long time ago!" Remember, I was 13. Nevertheless, those powerful 6 words were the precipice to changing my life forever. I know I wouldn't be who I am today without daily reminders of this little known fact. 


Growing up, I learned that my brain was like a computer. Garbage in, garbage out. If I made a B or C on a math test and said repeatedly, "I suck at math!", my brain would eventually believe it and math would surely be the death of me. But instead, I listened to self-talk CD's on making good grades, graduated high school at the age of 16, entered college and made A's and B's in college algebra. I might not have been born with the analytical side of my brain as strong as the creative side, but I changed that! All by saying a simple phrase to myself every day before school, "I enjoy math. It's easy for me and I can solve equations with minimal effort." Or something like that.


The trick about self-talk is the way it's done. Everything you think and say needs to be in first person. "I am beautiful" rather than looking in the mirror and saying, "You're beautiful". The brain is very literal and after hearing positive things enough times, the brain's chemical makeup and wiring actually begins to change. It yields more results than prayer, meditation and hypnotism combined. It's science, it's a proven method, and it WORKS.


I've used this technique to stop biting my finger nails, make good grades, lose weight and eat healthy, and now my goal is to use it for roller derby. For those reading who might not understand roller derby, it's tough. There are times when every skater doubts him/herself and wonders if they have what it takes to play well. But as with any other successful athlete, high achievement is only fulfilled by those with a great PMA (positive mental attitude). Take Muhammad Ali, for example. He was claiming to be a champion long before he actually ever reached that goal. I'm pretty sure his attitude accounted for about 99% of his success. When the mind is in a healthy place, the body will follow suit. 


So, that's where I'm at right now. I've heard so many women put themselves down when it comes to derby. I've heard everything from, "I suck at A-frame stops" to, "I wish I could skate that fast but I'm slower than molasses". This has got to change! Our goals can never be met with this kind of stinking thinking. Now I'm on a mission. I've written a script and will record my roller derby self-talk CD this week. I want to start by giving it to my entire team, then the league, and my ultimate vision is to eventually make this available world wide. Let me rephrase that, I WILL succeed in helping change the lives of derby players everywhere. Here is a brief sample of some of the lines that will be on the CD. For any derby players reading, say these things to yourself every day and I guarantee you'll start to see a difference in your performance.

I love to play Roller Derby.

I realize that what I say about myself and others about roller derby is very important, and I will replace any negative thoughts or comments with uplifting, positives ones. 

I deserve to play roller derby and I deserve all of the good things it brings into my life. 

Roller derby is important for the joy and happiness it offers me in pursuit of my ultimate achievements. 

I skate with purpose, determination, and strength.

I begin every practice with a clear mind and a specific plan to get the most from my time and effort. I follow my plan, and I reach my goals. 

An accurate description of me would include the words: Skillful, energetic, determined, hard working, enthusiastic and highly successful. 

And it's as simple as that....you're on your way :)

Our Blissmas Tree!

Rock out With your Quads out!

Today marks the one week-aversary of my butt making good friends with the skating rink floor. I don't remember the last time I felt pain like that. I labored for hours and gave birth naturally without a single tear; yet falling on my tailbone made me cry like a baby in front of everyone. Not my proudest moment. I knew it would bruise but I had no idea that I'd practically develop a tumor on my ass. After posting a picture of its raw, nastiness, a friend brought it to my attention that it's officially a Hematoma. I'm 30 years old but still had to Google that word. I wasn't sure if it was just a fancy, scientific word for "bruise" or, if I was going to die. Turns out, it's both. Okay, maybe I won't die from it but the pooling of blood that's taking place underneath this horrible bruise ranks right up there with death for me. Oh. My. Goodness.... it really hurts. Today, I'm thankful that this is an off week for skating practice because I'd surely be missing them all. Now, time to purchase some padded shorts. Dorky or not, I refuse to let this happen again. I do enjoy sitting.

Moving on...

Thanksgiving is in 2 days. TWO days?? Where in the world did this year go? It's true what they say, the older we get, the faster time flies. I must be old because it feels like the calendar is on sonic speed. There are so many things I'm thankful for, I'll spare my 3 readers of the elongated list. Instead, I've decided that I want to spend Thanksgiving the old fashioned way. I'm going to invite all of my neighbors over, feast on a delicious meal and then kill them all and take their land. Doesn't that sound fun? But seriously, I'm thinking maybe I won't be an Atheist...we don't have any holidays. And I sure do love sitting around with people I love and committing gluttony in the way only Americans know best. I'm guessing that in 48 hours from now, I'll be in a stuffing induced coma and ready for a nap. Ah, traditions.

Someone asked me that other day, "If you're an Agnostic, what are you thankful for and who are you thanking?" Oh man, did she open a can of logical worms. Here is the answer I gave:

"I'm glad you asked! I'm thankful for the food I eat and in correlation to that, for the farmers who grow the food and the truckers who transport the food. I'm thankful my husband has the drive and ambition to start his own business in a time where jobs are hard to find. I'm thankful for science and the understanding that I evolved from a single cell organism. I'm thankful for the invention of the internet. It has given me the ability to help further open my mind and to express it so that others can read it years down the road. If that's you, hello from the past! I'm thankful for skepticism and the freedom to question everything from Hematoma's to religion. I'm thankful for biology which allowed my husband's sperm to fertilize my egg and thus created our beautiful baby daughter. But most of all, I'm not a person who covets what other people have; I'm aware of the burdens that so many others carry and I'm very thankful that I'm alive, healthy and loved by many."

And with that, the conversation ended. Sorry lady, despite what you might have learned in church, gratitude is for everyone regardless of their beliefs. And I'm very thankful for that!

Dog bless America.

Women - Simply Complex

Oh blogging, how I've missed thee. I can't believe I've been such a slacker with writing. It's my first true love. I was home schooled most of my life and I'm grateful to my mother for instilling the love for writing at such a young age. It's a healthy, therapeutic habit that I find stimulating and calming at the same time.


So for my first new blog entry, I'd like to talk about women. Aren't we great? So complex, so interesting, so emotional. I'm sure if any men are reading this they're thinking, "pfft, yeah, 'complex' is putting it lightly." It's taken me a long time to admit that it's true. We are complex, but not so much that we can't be understood. I think a lot of women don't even understand themselves, which makes it extremely difficult to adequately explain ourselves to men so they aren't left scratching their heads every time we open our mouths. 


I once read a book called "The Female Brain" which, in great detail, explains the inner workings of our brains from conception to old age. It was very interesting and is not only helping me understand why I say and do certain things, but it also helped me understand where Olivia is in her brain development and why she drives me to the brink of insanity on most days. Yes, she's a baby and most babies will drive you nuts at some point. But she's also a female baby which translates into "There's a lot more going on upstairs than we realize". And boy (or girl), isn't that the truth. 


I'm really saddened at how often I see women putting themselves down. What's up with this sickening epidemic?  I think women by nature are driven by the pressures of their parents, teachers, peers and society to be the best, the smartest, the prettiest and the most talented. When in reality, we should be learning that there's no such thing. There will always be someone skinnier, prettier or smarter out there and life isn't about being the best. It's about reaching our own personal best...even if that means you're average. Who are we to say that we aren't good enough? Did People magazine tell you that you're inadequate unless you can afford designer clothes, a boob job and a fairy tale wedding that's over in 72 days? Go bowling and spare me. There's so much more to finding happiness in this life than what's portrayed in the unenlightened bubble of society. 


I, for one, am perfectly happy in my "average" state. Am I the prettiest girl around? To my husband, yes, but not by society's standards. Am I the most skilled derby player? Of course not. Am I the smartest? No way. But I do know what I am, and that's one of a kind. I'm beautiful inside and out, I care deeply for others, I'm an amazing mother, a loving wife, and I know that I'm capable of achieving anything I want to...without fear of failure. For me, the only way I could fail is if I didn't try at all. If all of the women I know would spend half as much time building themselves up instead of complaining about what's not good enough, they'd be reaching their true potential in no time. Which, by the way, has nothing to do with external looks. Ask any man around, while it's true they are visual creatures, the sexiest part of a woman is her confidence. Paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, confidence beats everything else. 


In closing, here is one of my favorite quotes:


"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?' Who are you not to be? Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We are born to make manifest the glory...that is within us all. It's not just in some of us, it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." - Marianne Williamson