In case you weren't aware, I love roller derby. Not only for the invigorating feeling I get when I race around the track, or the incredible health benefits from losing weight and getting in shape; but more so from the amazing people that are as equally passionate about being a team player as I am. Not to mention the friendships that are built through a mutual love for the fastest growing sport in the world. Awesome.
Speaking of teams, mine is quite possibly the best ever. The Suicide Shifters are a close knit, uplifting, positively charged group of women that I couldn't be more proud to know, learn from and skate next to. We push each other to improve, we're all intense in our desire to win, and we actually enjoy being around each other outside of the rink. Oh, and there's NO drama at all, which is a huge plus. Currently, we are undefeated with a 2-0 record and for our team in particular, we're making Shifter history in DDD. I cannot even begin to tell you how amazing that feels!
If you haven't been to one of our game yet this season, there's still time! Our next bout is on Saturday, July 14th. Click here to find out more and to purchase tickets. You won't regret it! But beware, it might make you want to put on some skates :)
Friday, July 6, 2012
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
Happily Ever After
Someone asked me the other day, "What's the secret to your happy marriage?" To which I promptly replied, "Lots of wine and blow jobs". Just kidding...I prefer beer.
There really isn't a secret ingredient to a happy life with your partner. It's equal parts love, respect, compromise, patience and honesty. Throw in a dash of romance and you've got the recipe for happy love. At least for us, this puts the icing on the marriage cake. Why am I using cooking metaphors? I have no idea. I hate to cook.
While I do have the closest thing to a perfect mate any girl could find, there are still days when I want to punch him in the face (or other painful areas), divorce his ass and move to Fiji. I mean, if I'm being completely honest. But that's true about anyone. A spouse, your parents, your children, siblings, best friends...they all tempt us with thoughts of mass destruction; or in some cases, a homicide/suicide. However, the more sane lot of us realize that solves nothing, so alas, we're left with working things out.
When I say "working things out", I don't mean ignoring the disagreement or altercation and waiting for it to just go away. I interpret the word "work" literally. I'm sure you've heard the ol' adage, "Anything worth having takes lots of hard work"? Well, put down that sugar coated spoon and take a huge dose of reality, because it's so true. I work every day at making my marriage a healthy one. With years of counseling, books read on the subject and over $2,000 worth of classes and workshops; I'm still so far from being the perfect spouse...but at least I'm trying.
So, here are a few things that we do on a regular basis to keep our marriage a healthy and mutually happy one:
1. Spend quality time together. This may sound simple and obvious, but those of you who have children, jobs, hobbies and separate social lives, this can be very difficult to do sometimes. Turn off the smart phone, put the kids to bed, turn off the TV and just talk. Even if it's just for 15 minutes, the intimacy that's built is important.
2. Keep a sense of humor. Life has a funny way of intruding on our vision of the perfect day, or date, or even intimate moments. When things don't go exactly as planned, don't overreact and turn into the Incredible Hulk over it. We try to see the funny side of crappy situations, laugh about it and move on.
3. Be forgiving. Contrary to popular belief, I'm not perfect. And neither is my husband. We're two very imperfect human beings trying to perfect our love for one another and sometimes we fail...a lot. I've learned to never sweat the small stuff and to remember that leaving the mayo on the counter every single time is not nearly as important as the emasculation he might feel if I rip him a new one over it.
4. Romance. Guys, take note here. This is an important one. And I don't mean lavish gifts and fancy dinners (although I'd never turn it down!), it's the simple gestures that mean the most. Andrew and I leave notes for each other around the house quite often which always make me smile. Or hearing a sweet song in the grocery store and dancing with me on the cereal isle. I'm ready for number 5 just thinking about it!
5. SEX. Life gets in the way of this sometimes and it shouldn't. We all know that sex is like oxygen for men, but it's equally as important for women, just in a different way. Not only is it a MUST for a great marriage, it also has other perks like: relieves stress, burns calories and boosts your immune system! So go ahead, get you some.
I could write an entire book on the things we work on to improve our relationship, but I think this is the foundation of our "happily ever after". The road to marital bliss is always under construction.
There really isn't a secret ingredient to a happy life with your partner. It's equal parts love, respect, compromise, patience and honesty. Throw in a dash of romance and you've got the recipe for happy love. At least for us, this puts the icing on the marriage cake. Why am I using cooking metaphors? I have no idea. I hate to cook.
While I do have the closest thing to a perfect mate any girl could find, there are still days when I want to punch him in the face (or other painful areas), divorce his ass and move to Fiji. I mean, if I'm being completely honest. But that's true about anyone. A spouse, your parents, your children, siblings, best friends...they all tempt us with thoughts of mass destruction; or in some cases, a homicide/suicide. However, the more sane lot of us realize that solves nothing, so alas, we're left with working things out.
When I say "working things out", I don't mean ignoring the disagreement or altercation and waiting for it to just go away. I interpret the word "work" literally. I'm sure you've heard the ol' adage, "Anything worth having takes lots of hard work"? Well, put down that sugar coated spoon and take a huge dose of reality, because it's so true. I work every day at making my marriage a healthy one. With years of counseling, books read on the subject and over $2,000 worth of classes and workshops; I'm still so far from being the perfect spouse...but at least I'm trying.
So, here are a few things that we do on a regular basis to keep our marriage a healthy and mutually happy one:
1. Spend quality time together. This may sound simple and obvious, but those of you who have children, jobs, hobbies and separate social lives, this can be very difficult to do sometimes. Turn off the smart phone, put the kids to bed, turn off the TV and just talk. Even if it's just for 15 minutes, the intimacy that's built is important.
2. Keep a sense of humor. Life has a funny way of intruding on our vision of the perfect day, or date, or even intimate moments. When things don't go exactly as planned, don't overreact and turn into the Incredible Hulk over it. We try to see the funny side of crappy situations, laugh about it and move on.
3. Be forgiving. Contrary to popular belief, I'm not perfect. And neither is my husband. We're two very imperfect human beings trying to perfect our love for one another and sometimes we fail...a lot. I've learned to never sweat the small stuff and to remember that leaving the mayo on the counter every single time is not nearly as important as the emasculation he might feel if I rip him a new one over it.
4. Romance. Guys, take note here. This is an important one. And I don't mean lavish gifts and fancy dinners (although I'd never turn it down!), it's the simple gestures that mean the most. Andrew and I leave notes for each other around the house quite often which always make me smile. Or hearing a sweet song in the grocery store and dancing with me on the cereal isle. I'm ready for number 5 just thinking about it!
5. SEX. Life gets in the way of this sometimes and it shouldn't. We all know that sex is like oxygen for men, but it's equally as important for women, just in a different way. Not only is it a MUST for a great marriage, it also has other perks like: relieves stress, burns calories and boosts your immune system! So go ahead, get you some.
I could write an entire book on the things we work on to improve our relationship, but I think this is the foundation of our "happily ever after". The road to marital bliss is always under construction.
Thursday, March 22, 2012
One dirty, little habit at a time.
Today, for the first time in almost 2 months, I've decided to forgo my usual daily nap (more about that later) and sit down to tickle the ivory keys. Yeah, that's usually a piano metaphor but today, it's a Mac metaphor.
I'm not even sure where to begin as to why I've been so absent from blogging. Well, I've been absent from a lot of things lately. The first and most taxing reason is that I've been invaded by a little, nasty bug called Bronchitis. The word itself doesn't sound so scary, but let me tell you, it's one of the worst illness I've ever experienced. Possibly even worse than having jaw surgery and being sewn shut for 6 weeks. I first started feeling a minor sore throat and cough on March 6th. I hit it hard with my usual armory of natural immune system builders like Vitamin C, Immunoplex, Congaplex and some other hard to pronounce titles for similar home remedies. For the common cold or allergies, this approach usually works.
Little did I know that my lungs were VERY angry at me and were extremely resistant to my choice of treatment. After suffering for 10 days, I broke down and went to Care Now. The very rushed and slightly condescending doctor said my lungs sounded so horrible that she thought I might have Pneumonia and wanted to do a chest X-ray. She said, "Great news! You don't have Pneumonia. It's just a severe case of Bronchitis!". . . . Oh. Joy. She proceeded to give me a nice little shot in my ass of steroids (I could write an entire blog entry on how horrible this substance is for your body) and gave me a 10 day course of antibiotics. I thought for SURE I'd feel much better in a few days....boy was I wrong. It's been 9 days since I started that treatment and I'm still feeling like a big bowl of crap. I've been sleeping 10-12 hours every night and taking a 1-2 hour nap every day while my child sleeps. I haven't felt this lethargic since pregnancy. And no, I'm not pregnant. I haven't even let my poor husband touch me in a very long time, for obvious reasons.
More so than feeling like I'm going to cough up a lung and die at any moment, the thing that depresses me the most is the fact that I've missed SO much skating. I haven't skated in over 3 weeks and it's what I cry about the most these days. I feel like I've let my body down, I've let my self-esteem down and of course, my team. Our season is right around the corner (my team plays in May) and this is the time I should be on my skates the most. Instead, the most exercise I'm getting is hopping from my bed to the couch and back several times a day. Holy crap, I'm not sure how much more I can take. If I'm not functioning at at least 70% by Monday, it's back to the doctor I go. Let's see if these drug pushing assholes can give me something that will actually work so I can get back to my life.
On the bright side, I quit smoking 6 weeks ago (this Saturday)!! I'm really proud of this and I'm pretty sure this illness is my body's way of purging out the crap. Or, it could just be a really poorly timed coincidence. Either way, I'm so glad cigarettes no longer have the power over me they did for so long. What a nasty, disgusting, stinky, expensive, dirty little habit. I've been using an app on my phone called SinceIQuit, and it shows me how much money I've saved along the way...at 5 weeks and 5 days, by not smoking 474.98 cigarettes, I've saved $148.24! That's astounding. Go me! Now, if only I could kick my daily caffeine addiction, I'd be all set.
I'm not even sure where to begin as to why I've been so absent from blogging. Well, I've been absent from a lot of things lately. The first and most taxing reason is that I've been invaded by a little, nasty bug called Bronchitis. The word itself doesn't sound so scary, but let me tell you, it's one of the worst illness I've ever experienced. Possibly even worse than having jaw surgery and being sewn shut for 6 weeks. I first started feeling a minor sore throat and cough on March 6th. I hit it hard with my usual armory of natural immune system builders like Vitamin C, Immunoplex, Congaplex and some other hard to pronounce titles for similar home remedies. For the common cold or allergies, this approach usually works.
Little did I know that my lungs were VERY angry at me and were extremely resistant to my choice of treatment. After suffering for 10 days, I broke down and went to Care Now. The very rushed and slightly condescending doctor said my lungs sounded so horrible that she thought I might have Pneumonia and wanted to do a chest X-ray. She said, "Great news! You don't have Pneumonia. It's just a severe case of Bronchitis!". . . . Oh. Joy. She proceeded to give me a nice little shot in my ass of steroids (I could write an entire blog entry on how horrible this substance is for your body) and gave me a 10 day course of antibiotics. I thought for SURE I'd feel much better in a few days....boy was I wrong. It's been 9 days since I started that treatment and I'm still feeling like a big bowl of crap. I've been sleeping 10-12 hours every night and taking a 1-2 hour nap every day while my child sleeps. I haven't felt this lethargic since pregnancy. And no, I'm not pregnant. I haven't even let my poor husband touch me in a very long time, for obvious reasons.
More so than feeling like I'm going to cough up a lung and die at any moment, the thing that depresses me the most is the fact that I've missed SO much skating. I haven't skated in over 3 weeks and it's what I cry about the most these days. I feel like I've let my body down, I've let my self-esteem down and of course, my team. Our season is right around the corner (my team plays in May) and this is the time I should be on my skates the most. Instead, the most exercise I'm getting is hopping from my bed to the couch and back several times a day. Holy crap, I'm not sure how much more I can take. If I'm not functioning at at least 70% by Monday, it's back to the doctor I go. Let's see if these drug pushing assholes can give me something that will actually work so I can get back to my life.
On the bright side, I quit smoking 6 weeks ago (this Saturday)!! I'm really proud of this and I'm pretty sure this illness is my body's way of purging out the crap. Or, it could just be a really poorly timed coincidence. Either way, I'm so glad cigarettes no longer have the power over me they did for so long. What a nasty, disgusting, stinky, expensive, dirty little habit. I've been using an app on my phone called SinceIQuit, and it shows me how much money I've saved along the way...at 5 weeks and 5 days, by not smoking 474.98 cigarettes, I've saved $148.24! That's astounding. Go me! Now, if only I could kick my daily caffeine addiction, I'd be all set.
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
For the Birthday Girl!
Two years ago today, I gave birth to a 7lb 15oz baby girl named Olivia Rose. After laboring at home until I was 7-8 centimeters, we took the agonizing 15 minute drive to the birthing center to finish the job. Little did I know that in less than 2 hours, my body would do its job and safely bring this sweet baby into the world. And yes, I did it 100% drug free. And yes, it hurt like hell.
It's true what they say. The older you get, the fast time flies by. I'm familiar with Einstein's theory of relativity, but I don't have to be happy about it. Watching your child grow and mature before your eyes is an interesting, wonderful and sad thing all at the same time. It truly feels like yesterday I found out I was pregnant and now she's reciting the alphabet backwards and counting to 10 in 4 different languages. When did all of this happen? It's really hard to comprehend.
Now I won't lie, motherhood is NOT always a bowl of cheery f*cking cherries. Although it is rewarding and full of wonderful, sweet moments; it's also a whole lot of scream filled cries, impatient demands, extreme sleep deprivation, sticky messes, smelly messes, purposeful defiance, and let's not forget a whole lot of ungrateful whining. And I wouldn't trade a single bit of it for the world. To quote my clever brother Adam, "You chase your dreams, it's what you get". So insightful.
Happy Birthday sweet Olivia Rose! Your parents love you more than you'll ever understand. That is until you have your own little bundle of stinky joy :)
It's true what they say. The older you get, the fast time flies by. I'm familiar with Einstein's theory of relativity, but I don't have to be happy about it. Watching your child grow and mature before your eyes is an interesting, wonderful and sad thing all at the same time. It truly feels like yesterday I found out I was pregnant and now she's reciting the alphabet backwards and counting to 10 in 4 different languages. When did all of this happen? It's really hard to comprehend.
Now I won't lie, motherhood is NOT always a bowl of cheery f*cking cherries. Although it is rewarding and full of wonderful, sweet moments; it's also a whole lot of scream filled cries, impatient demands, extreme sleep deprivation, sticky messes, smelly messes, purposeful defiance, and let's not forget a whole lot of ungrateful whining. And I wouldn't trade a single bit of it for the world. To quote my clever brother Adam, "You chase your dreams, it's what you get". So insightful.
Happy Birthday sweet Olivia Rose! Your parents love you more than you'll ever understand. That is until you have your own little bundle of stinky joy :)
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Shut up and skate!
This past weekend absolutely kicked my ass. And I loved every minute of it! I attended the Certified Derby Training hosted by House of Quad and taught by some amazing, national level derby players. It was both an honor and a privilege to skate amongst 176 other dedicated, passionate derby lovers who were all there for the same reason...to have their ass handed to them while growing in their passion and knowledge for the fastest growing sport in the world. Pure awesomeness.
This camp was 2.5 days of skating, skating and more skating. The first night I fell on my left arm and felt (and heard) my shoulder pop out of socket and back in. That was not pleasant. I thought it was fine and continued to be hit repeatedly by my fellow skaters, when suddenly it began to ache to the point of nausea. Luckily, I'm a great visualizer so I took a break, took a breath, and told myself that I wasn't going to puke. It totally worked. And I almost pooped my pants instead. Not joking.
Although exhausted, battered and bruised, the last day was my favorite. We worked on some agility drills that gave me a few "light bulb" moments. I was able to try and accomplish a hockey stop without falling! I also tuned up my juking and running on toe stops skills which are both imperative in derby. I'm still a long ways from my vision of the type of skater I want to be, but this was an amazing, giant step in the right direction and even though I feel like I got hit by a Semi-truck, I'd do it all over again in a heartbeat.
Last night was our first Shifter team practice. Our new coach, Rhino, is a cut-the-crap, no-nonsense, if you're not moving you're wasting time kind of teacher...and I love it. He's loud, he's direct, and he's not there to blow smoke up our asses. I know, some narcissistic people really enjoy smoke enemas, but not this team. When Rhino says skate, we say "how fast?". When Rhino says hit, we hip-check the closest skater and when Rhino says listen, our mouths stop moving and we're all ears. No one is half-assing anything this year and I'm stoked to see how much we improve. Are you hungry? Well you should be because it's time to EAT SHIFTER!!!
This camp was 2.5 days of skating, skating and more skating. The first night I fell on my left arm and felt (and heard) my shoulder pop out of socket and back in. That was not pleasant. I thought it was fine and continued to be hit repeatedly by my fellow skaters, when suddenly it began to ache to the point of nausea. Luckily, I'm a great visualizer so I took a break, took a breath, and told myself that I wasn't going to puke. It totally worked. And I almost pooped my pants instead. Not joking.
Although exhausted, battered and bruised, the last day was my favorite. We worked on some agility drills that gave me a few "light bulb" moments. I was able to try and accomplish a hockey stop without falling! I also tuned up my juking and running on toe stops skills which are both imperative in derby. I'm still a long ways from my vision of the type of skater I want to be, but this was an amazing, giant step in the right direction and even though I feel like I got hit by a Semi-truck, I'd do it all over again in a heartbeat.
Last night was our first Shifter team practice. Our new coach, Rhino, is a cut-the-crap, no-nonsense, if you're not moving you're wasting time kind of teacher...and I love it. He's loud, he's direct, and he's not there to blow smoke up our asses. I know, some narcissistic people really enjoy smoke enemas, but not this team. When Rhino says skate, we say "how fast?". When Rhino says hit, we hip-check the closest skater and when Rhino says listen, our mouths stop moving and we're all ears. No one is half-assing anything this year and I'm stoked to see how much we improve. Are you hungry? Well you should be because it's time to EAT SHIFTER!!!
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